I spent a weekend in another world called New York City
and learned a lot about emotions + expectations
nyc, crossing bridge into manhattan (2024)
Landing in NYC was like being transported to another planet.
And not because of the skyscrapers - those were actually expected. As the only images I’d known of the city were always somewhere between glass towers and Brooklyn Brownstones.
But rather because the area I decided to stay in - the lower East Side of Manhattan. With its brick buildings and iron fire escapes, vintage shops, and a street-level humanism that made the sky feel closer - it looked nothing like what I was expecting. It was completely foreign to my mind’s eye.
And that’s part of what made this trip so special. Unexpectedly escaping my expectations.
It felt like I was seeing the city behind the scenes, without its glamour but still beautiful in its rawness. I stepped out of the eclecticism of the Moxy, over cracked sidewalks and by storefronts pressed shoulder to shoulder to take in the world I had been dropped into.
I was welcomed by the cozy atmosphere of the oldest organic vegan restaurant in NYC, Caravan of Dreams. The sound of the live band feeding the space as I indulged in seitan nachos and gulped strawberry lemonades.
There was an event across town where a TikTok crush of mine (my TikTok obsession was going strong in 2024) would be dj’ing, but I didn’t have the energy to climb the mountain of the two train rides or $40 Lyft (one way!) between us. So, I kept it local to LES and stopped by a late happy hour.
Verlaine’s warm lighting paired with chilled lychee martinis would have been enough. But it also came with a kindness that made sure I didn’t feel as alone as I was. Being pulled into multiple conversations and sharing laughs with the manager who also made sure to keep checking on me (and even gave me a free drink) made it feel like one of those neighborhood staples locals run into for a refreshing buzz and taste of community. And for a couple of hours, I was part of that community.
I smiled in bed that night at the success of day one. And woke up ready for a beautiful summer Saturday that would split itself into two parts.
acai bowl, almond butter smoothie (good thanks), 2024
Part one
was all about exploring more of the LES and shopping.
I started the day at Good Thanks, fueling my body with an acai bowl and almond butter smoothie filling enough to be satisfying but light enough not to slow me down.
Then I took to the pavement, walking in, all around, and out of shops with large bags from stores like LAAMS and Extra Butter filled with shoes and vinyl records.
Part two
started with getting ready for the night in the middle of the day.
My friend arrived from Philly and her friend from Jersey, and the tiny hotel became a dressing room as we changed clothes, oiled up our brown skin, and mixed tequila with juices.
with the girls, everyday people nyc (2024)
Our fragrances followed as we hopped out the Lyft at Pier 17, following a piece of the crowd that appeared to be headed toward the same spot we were looking for. And we found so much more than what we were looking for.
The rooftop of the pier was the perfect space for a party, and Everyday People was the perfect party for the rooftop of the pier. A sea of melanin, wide smiles, and swaying bodies synchronized to music against a backdrop of panoramic views of the Manhattan skyline altered my brain chemistry.
We didn’t stop dancing from the moment we entered, blending with the sea and its connection to the genres blaring from the speakers: hip hop, afrobeats, house, dancehall.
communal, joyful, affirming.
The sunset was hypnotizing and the experience continued under the stars, shining lights, and at one point, bubbles floating above our heads. I felt like I could make a life here, outside, permanently in this night.
But the party had to end. So we stopped by Scarr’s for pizza slices, then squeezed into my eclectic Moxy bed.
I never do well with saying goodbye.
so the next morning was a little tough, after grabbing coffee and teas at the Granddaddy Coffee Shop and my friend hopping in her Uber to the train station, I held back tears until I was back inside the privacy of the Moxy.
I don’t always anticipate my feelings, but I always respect them. Then I try to leave them with the moment that owns them, and move on to the next.
It was time to meet my other TikTok crush for brunch.
It had been a while since I was around someone I found attractive in that way and I was admittedly nervous. And also a bit awkward as we sat and ate inside Sweet Chick and I aimed the fork holding a piece of hash brown toward my mouth but missed - the food hit my lip and fell back to the plate (he saw, neither of us acknowledged it, I wanted to disappear inside of myself).
Afterward, he walked around the LES with me, in and out of thrift stores and explaining the difference between thrift and consignment - information I would retain and utilize soon after this… date?
Then he caught the train with me to Brooklyn since he was heading back home and I was heading that way for more shopping. And it was easy to face my fears of the subway with him by my side. The worries of not knowing how to buy my ticket and potentially holding up a line or needing to watch for crazies pushing people onto the tracks subsided (you pay right at the gate with apple pay! And idk, just stand further back I guess).
conquering my “fear” of the subway in nyc, 2024
The first train was crowded so we stood close, my back to his front as we held the same pole. Then when the crowd dispersed a little I switched to another pole to turn around and face him. To see his face. To see him more in this experience with me. But I didn’t expect the way he would be looking back at me. And it might have just been the way he looks, it might not have been anything special but I might as well have melted to a puddle on the floor. I folded, darting my eyes in another direction. And from this first train to the next, every time I tried to sneak a glance at him again, he would somehow keep catching it. And I would fold every time.
He let me know which stop to take and our moment came to an end. I stepped off the train and emerged from underground alone. And something about “the alone” in this moment was overpowering. I found myself walking around an unknown part of Brooklyn fighting back more tears. Succumbing to my overthinking of every seemingly weird thing I did between brunch and now. Thinking how I haven’t truly had an interest in someone in so long and feeling like I might have messed this up.
I gathered myself and all these thoughts that are easy to fight off in theory and tucked them deep into my pockets for later. For now, it was the last day of a trip in which I needed to be fully present. There was shopping to be done. Concerns about my love life weren’t on the itinerary.
Awoke Vintage gave the consignment shop vibes I learned about earlier. I could browse through Urban Jungle / L Train Vintage all day, and they charged for the bag but it was worth it for the finds. Other People’s Clothes didn’t have a bad selection, but I might have just been tired from giving so much energy to Urban Jungle / L Train Vintage.
(Somewhere between these shops, I faced my subway fear alone, by the way. It required a pep talk filled with profanity and tough love, but it worked.)
However, I did sit comfortably in a Lyft to the final store on my list, an apothecary owned by an actual goddess, Ancient Blends. I purchased dragons blood sage, sampled tea, and was given a complementary cleansing ritual for sinuses. It was the exact energy I needed after the ups and downs of the day.
Back to the LES. Back to Scarr’s. Back to the hotel. And back to the airport the next day.
New York gave me a weekend of rawness. Emotions to work through. Experiences even my carefully crafted itinerary couldn’t have planned.
I was welcomed into surrender. To let go of what I thought I knew, get lost in the moments, and hold myself as I faced fears below the surface both externally and internally.
Embracing this world helped me escape my expectations, and return to myself.
-A
thanks for reading! if you’re more into the trip logistics than my love life lessons, check out this New York City setlist. a curated list of cultural and social favorites for your next trip to NYC.
